A new writing exercise:
Can I please ask you to read this short story (Paragraphs) with these points in mind, then comment:
- How was the central character portrayed and was this portrayal clear and interesting?
- What made you think this piece was a story and did you want to read on?
- What were the most, and least, successful aspects of the writing?
Cautious and vigilant, she slid down on her seat, her black car her coverage from the outside world. Sipping on a bottle of water and making herself comfortable, knowing she was going to be in that partly-empty parking lot for a long time, she took out her notepad and a pen. Taking note of the gold-plated D3710 plaque on the side of the building she was surveilling, she was ready for some discovery.
At first sight, this building seemed like those beautiful rich cabinets one would find in the woods. The enterprise’s beige-almost-brown exterior, the algae-coloured wooden roofing, the wooden ceiling exactly like tree trunks, and the sturdy wooden pillar, was picture perfect of a relaxation establishment. But having followed her suspect to this building, she knew better than to be fooled by its appearance. There were more to this place than met the eyes, and she was head-bent on finding it out.
On either side of the two pillars which decorated with various sizes and density of rectangular rocks, ranging from pale black to diverse shade of brown, stood two big Douglas fir trees. And in front of one of the trees, an American flag proudly stood. Beautiful and well-trimmed bushes aligned along the entrance of the establishment and around the parking lot, this place definitely sucked in a lot of money.
Taking note of the license plates of the car standing by the parking lot for more than thirty minutes, she indexed the ones she found suspicious for further more-in-depth research. Keeping an eye open for passers-by, she pulled-in all her acting skills to present herself as someone who belongs in this place. Last thing she needed was to raise questions that might end in her having to pull her gun.
Again the points to keep in mind while reviewing are:
- How was the central character portrayed and was this portrayal clear and interesting?
- What made you think this piece was a story and did you want to read on?
- What were the most, and least, successful aspects of the writing?
Feel free to comment in here or on the Facebook post itself.
 | You can read the first fiction writing practice from my writing class on Practicing Writing Fiction |
She is suspicious and trying to play CIS.